Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Irrational Fears

Have you ever been in the back seat of a car and all these thoughts of a million and one ways you'll get in a car accident begin to flow through your mind? I hate that. I have been having that happen to me alot lately, and I'm not exactly worried about me, but I'm worried about my baby, I'm worried about my friends, my husband, my brothers and sisters, I'm worried about everyone I care for.

I guess that is part of being pregnant, right? Every time someone gets in a car lately I wonder in the back of my mind if it's the last time I'll see that someone I love. A movie plays out in my mind and I mourn their death before they even get in the car.

Last night I drove in the back seat of a truck, with a safe qualified driver, but all I could think about was what if we all die? Or what if one of these people that I love die? I wanted to grab ahold of everyone and savor them. I had to put my hand on Chris's back and hold on to him for the rest of the drive because I kept having images of him dying and I didn't want to lose him. I thought if I held on to him he would be okay.

I have decided that no one is allowed to die anymore...yea, I know, that wont work. But I just want all my family and friends to know how much I love and care for them. Even when sometimes you haven't heard from me in a while, it doesn't mean I don't think about and still love and care about you. I love you all so much!!!

I wish you all a long, healthy, and happy life, and please...Drive Safe!!!!